Journal Entry #48

January 15, 2018

Am I an asshole? I think I am. I can’t help myself. My boyfriend has been complaining about his job endlessly and today, I didn’t let him vent to me. I actually attacked him verbally. I know I shouldn’t have and the whole time I’m thinking, “Hunida, you’re being a dick” but the rudeness just flows out of my mouth. On Facebook, a girl I used to work with got her new car broken into and she writes on her status “ugh people just never want to see other people doing better than them” and I wrote “girl, it was probably someone who doesn’t even know you” which is probably true but it wasn’t nice of me to comment and knock on someone who’s already down.

What is wrong with me?

I finished reading Turtles All The Way Down (look out for My Favorites Quotes From… that book coming out very soon!). I started reading Emma in the Night. So far, so good.

Yesterday, we kind of skipped Sushi Sunday by going to this new Chinese buffet, that we drove past earlier in the week, instead. They did have some sushi offerings there though and of course we had to try ’em. I only tried the salmon sashimi, which wasn’t so bad but def not as good as Sushi Neko, lol.

kirin buffetkirin interior

The buffet was fairly small so we didn’t spend too much time there.

My dizziness is very faint now. I tried this different exercise I found on YouTube today. I think it made me a li’l better but I also was kind of already getting better.

I’ll try to work tomorrow and just hope it doesn’t come back!!

Last night, I pretty much read all night. I kinda wanna do the same today. Boyfriend didn’t get home til like 8p because he worked the night shift today. He came and picked me up so we could go to the dispensary together–we have nowhere else to go today and I wanted to test my dizziness outside of the house once. It seemed even better when I was out and about!

We’re smoking a blunt now and then boyfriend’s gonna make dinner. It’s already 10p and neither of us have ate anything all day!!

I should’ve had a snack while he was at work but I was busy looking up, watching, and reading others’ experiences with BPPV all day.



34 thoughts on “Journal Entry #48

  1. I’m so glad you’re dizziness is finally starting to fade 💜 maybe you’re getting close to your period? That always causes me to be a dick for no reason. Especially when you’re stressed out. Hope things keep improving! You’ll be back to work in no time (:

    Liked by 1 person

  2. At least you know you were being a butt so that’s good. lol. Many people are asses and don’t know they are doing it. Hope you feel better soon.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Crazy4you took what I was going to say. It’s probably just PMS. I know I am an asshole on it. Even my mom mentioned it this past weekend!
    I’m so glad it’s finally going away. You need to be better. I wish I was visiting there now and not stuck in this icy city!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. NOTHING is wrong with you. Maybe your hormones are out of whack, and it probably is that if you’re not your normal self lol. I often feel super bitchy sometimes only to figure out its my fucking hormones. 🙂 yes we could be nicer at times but it’s not always our fault 🙂
    I don’t eat at Chinese restaurants anymore.. either my taste buds have changed (probably, or most likely) but I don’t find the food as delicious anymore. We’ve also gotten ripped off several times too lol. But seriously, Chinese restaurants, like buffets, are dying. Business isn’t booming anymore. Several of them have already closed here. Anyway, rambly.. Glad you’re feeling better! ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yeah, I think the prescription pills and that I haven’t smoked a cigarette for a week has got me all out of whack. I know when I get extra bitchy though I’m like wtf then I check my period app and it always says 10 days before my period is to start LOL.
      I LOVE chinese food, maybe there aren’t any authentic restaurants in your area!? What do you mean you got ripped off, though?
      Yeah a ton of buffets are shutting down all the time. It makes me sad! 😦 It’s because of all the germaphobes lol sorry if you are one! I love food so idc really. 😛 It’s okay, I enjoy reading your rambles LOL thank you. ❤

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Ahh, I forgot you smoked cigs, withdrawal symptoms?
        That’s the thing though, they seem like they’re authentic restaurants but they’re like missing something, idk. And a few restaurants have over-charged, usually buffets are so-so priced, but they did use to be much cheaper. It’s inflation, I’m telling you, and that goes for everything too lol.
        Nah, I’m no germaphobe, I actually really like buffets, so it makes me feel bad that they’re closing but then again I understand that a lot of food is going to waste when no on eats there anymore. I love food too, I’m not usually as picky, I even like to try new things from the menu, while Alex sticks to the same things LMAO

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Oh my gosh! Now that you’re saying something; the Viet restaurant we just went to yesterday tried to give us less change than she was supposed to…luckily bf caught it! I can’t believe some people.
          There are still buffets galore here but the prices do keep getting higher! I like to try new things too. 😀 I always change my order if my bf wants to order the same thing as me so we can try more than one thing on the menu, ahha.

          Liked by 1 person

                    1. Happened to me too. It sent some of my comments on someone else’s page to spam because I never got a reply lmao. Same thing that had happened in your blog happened in theirs. I wonder if WP is working on something.

                      Liked by 1 person

  5. Did you and boyfriend make up? were you able to talk about or recognize what made you feel angry?
    Its okay to feel what you feel but if your feelings are causing another pain then it is good to try to work through them and finding out where it is coming from…..doesn’t make you an arsehole though, makes you human!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, we made up. 🙂 I don’t know if I recognized what made me angry. I think I just get that way sometimes…I have an attitude, as my mom would say, lol.
      Thank you, Jad! Sometimes I just feel like an arsehole (hehe ;D) and I can’t help myself.

      Liked by 1 person

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